24th March 2020
James Marshall

Sex Tips: James Epic Seduction Fail

Students often ask us how do we get past a girls resistance or what they can do to get laid, but the reality is it’s often them who is fucking it up! They want sex tips, when the simplest sex tip is just to make a move.

The guy is too scared of rejection to make a move. He is terrified about what will happen if he tries and fails so he waits and waits for the ‘perfect moment’ which will never arrive
He is clueless about the signals that the woman is sending and actually has no idea that she wants sex. This often comes from naïve or misinformed ideas about female sexuality. Social lies we are told like “girls don’t really like sex, they just trade it for relationships, money, jewelry, shoes”.
Guys with these mindsets will often assume that a woman wont want to have sex with him ‘too early’ and therefore he will put off making a move on her until date 3 or 4, by which point she is confused by his lack of sexuality and turned off by his shyness
He is scared that it will actually go ahead and he won’t know what to do or get stage fright. He might not be able to perform, might go soft from the pressure, or ejaculate too quickly.

The number one thing that you can do to avoid this scenario in future is to develop yourself into the kind of guy that just goes for it. The guy that pulls the trigger and tries to sexually escalate, and is comfortable being rejected. If you make this a habit, it becomes easier and easier every time, and women will actually respect you more for it.

Women respect a guy who has the balls to make a move, and the respect to stop when she sets a clear boundary. It’s a winning combination because it shows a strong masculine quality and ability to own your sexual intent without shame or shyness, but also a sensitivity and care for how you’re making her feel and the experience you’re giving her.

Don’t try to become a PUA, try to become someone who takes sexual risks while respecting women in the process. This is the best sex tip of all, because you have 100% control on how many times you pull the trigger in the next month! Make it a habit and you’ll get rejected more, but also get laid more, and never have to deal with the feeling of regret. You’ll know that you at least gave the seduction your best shot. And if you want to get our course to explore the world of ultimate sex mastery in-depth click HERE.

How to get your Ex Girlfriend back

26th March 2020
James Marshall

How to get your Ex Girlfriend back

There is a huge self-help industry around getting your ex girlfriend/boyfriend back, which I find irresponsible and damaging. It’s the same as offering Ex-junkies a special method to get back on drugs.

This is simply exploiting the loneliness of vulnerable people and is advising devastatingly bad advice from a presupposition of a scarcity of options and assumption that the dead relationship is worth saving. The absolute truth almost without exception is that it NEVER works when couples get back together after a serious breakup (as opposed to a fight where someone sleeps on a couch or at their mothers).

The ultimate advice on how to get your ex girlfriend back is, to never try to get your ex back. It’s called a breakup for a reason, it was broken.

Everyone (including the author) ignores this sage advice sometimes and very often couples will chew up years on again off again, with starkly diminishing returns as the makeup sex and nostalgia fades, to be replaced by bitter disappointment, denial and fatalism.

2. Women break up better than men

In general a woman coming out of a relationship will process her emotions faster and deeper than a man. She’ll cry, have a tantrum, get drunk or whatever does it for her and have a catharsis and then move on. (Occasionally she’ll become a stalking psycho but as you start to choose more level headed emotionally mature women this will happen less). She is also much more likely to buy a new dress, go out with her friends and fuck a few guys to get over it. Men will often close themselves off with a few friends and commiserate over hard liquor apathetically swipe through tinder, being flaked on by dumpy suburban girls, sending needy texts to his ex hoping she’ll take him back.

It’s vital that you learn seduction skills and mindsets, not to become the ultimate pick up artist but so that whenever you need to be skillfully single you can be. The best thing you can do after a break up is go out and date new women. Even if it’s fumbling and contrived at first, you need to have regular sexual expression, fun experiences and search for new direction in life.

3. Don’t try to replace your ex

You are not trying to find a replacement to your ex, someone as “good as her”.

You’ll just end up pining for her if you approach every date as a failed audition for girlfriend, with an idealized vision of your ex as the benchmark. You should take this time to explore more easy going less intense flings with girls that may not be your wife material but are fun, kind, sexual, exciting.

This very quickly becomes new energy and drive leading to untold abundance of sexual choice and dating fun.

Being actively single becomes the ideal time to work on yourself, process the mistakes of the last relationship and work on evolving yourself so that when you again meet someone truly compatible you’ll be ready for them.

On the reverse side, the worst thing you could do is jump into a serious relationship with the first or second girl you fuck because you can’t stand the uncertainty of single life, thereby downgrading to an even less fulfilling partnership based off a sloppy rebound.

4. Break ups are liberating and loving

At some point in your life the most caring and compassionate thing to do is leave somebody, or to accept and embrace when they do. Realizing that it is the act of being still together that is holding you both back from a better life experience can be incredibly difficult to accept. To not to take it as personal rejection and blame yourself or her for the inevitable is important. The price of staying in months longer than you should is not just the misery of it but the lost opportunities that passed you by while you were clinging to a redundant relationship.

5. Be clear that it’s over

Being clear about the ending is in alignment with the philosophy of being Natural, honest and direct. You must not only be direct on your opener but through out the whole relationship and especially at the end. A common way men use to breakup is to just become a shit boyfriend, avoid conflict and admitting his decision until she gets fed up and dumps him. By trying to be gentle he ends up causing both of you more pain and conflict. Often this soils the ending leaving bitterness between the couple.

7. Over doesn’t mean failure

Rather than seeing the end as a failure and desperately trying to resuscitate it, see the end for what it is and allow the desires and unexplored paths that had been bubbling under the surface express into reality. This isn’t a failed attempt to find the one but a time in your life with somebody you cared for that has changed and needs to be left behind so that you can both continue to grow, explore and prepare for the next one. This means you will be able to leave each other with relatively little heartache and then quite likely become friends later, continuing the direct and honest communication you always (or mostly) had.Ignore this all at your peril gentlemen, you have been warned. And when you come back after dragging out some god awful breakup, or trying to get a girlfriend pathetically after she’s moved on, while missing heaps of pussy and fun then I’ll just tell you the same thing. Next time you’ll hopefully limit the drama to a couple of weeks.

The Hero’s Journey Of Seductive Intent (Video)

30th March 2020
James Marshall

The Hero’s Journey Of Seductive Intent (Video)

In all hero’s journey stories, we are introduced to a character that is going through a voluntary or involuntary process of growth and learning.

This hero is enticed by a new possibility or forced out of his old comfort zone and as much as he may fear the changes that are occurring or wish it was all over as soon as possible, he is going to have to go through a number of transformations that require pressure, paradox, discomfort and confusion to grow. Like a caterpillar to a butterfly this gestation period of discomfort is necessary for the next way of being to come into existence.

The hero must learn to deal with the light and the dark of the world by facingtrials, expanding his being, learning skills and developing new strategies. In terms of the Hero within ourselves this means that we must face our inner
critics and shadows and evolve through them with personal growth tools and mentors. When a dark or heavy energy, emotion, concept or circumstance is present in our lives we are required to raise ourselves out of its grips by becoming more aware, connected to our creative source and through that becoming more resourceful and able to shift our being into doing.

Just like a hero in a story if we don’t learn to develop our character through challenge and new courageous experience we become one dimensional and stagnent. This is one of the primary dangers of our modern day culture. It prescribes a set of ideals that are increasingly shallow and ignore, deny and brush over the real deep meaning, complexity and relations that are the foundation of our real human potential and forward evolution. This depth and meaning that is the real container of our evolution has been replaced with an array of shiny things that bedazzle and distract us from the real work of engaging with our being and the challenges of grounding that mystery into our everyday world in action.

Similarly if we don’t learn to love the light and the dark in a healthy balanced way we run the risk of being unable to cope with these energies when they show up in our lives. Learning to deal with the shadow and the light is a vital part of life. They are just two sides of a spectrum of energy or two phases in a creation, destruction cycle that go on within and around us all the time. To deny one end of the spectrum or try and grasp and hoard one is only a recipe for suffering. This is like trying to trap some daylight for yourself so you can always have the day or trying to stop the sun from going down so the night doesn’t come. It’s an illusion.

Never before have we been so easily distracted and trapped in our own complexity, but paradoxically never before have we had so much freedom and potential to create a new reality for ourselves both as individuals as well as collectively in community.

In practical terms this means becoming better friends with both ends of the spectrum and filling in the gaps in our consciousness, connecting the dots and creating a world of more relevant and aligned meaning for ourselves and others. Instead of running from shadow energy and trying to ignore it instead go inside it and embrace it with love and compassion.

A major aspect of becoming a man is recognising and stepping up to the call of the hero’s journey. The hero’s journey is an archetypal evolutionary process of self-transformation from boyish immaturity to a state of deeper maturity and
resulting in effectively relating in the world. This is all about reclaiming your heroic potential and engaging the process of evolving as an embodied creator in creation with other creations and creators. This whole journey begins with a call for change and is completed with a home coming to the truth of the hero’s core being and awareness. It’s not always an easy task and sometimes we may even fail but the beauty and romance of the hero is that he always arises again to a new day of possibility and the journey begins again.

This is a journey from dependence to independence then interdependence and beyond. It’s about balancing being and doing and learning to have goals, direction, morals and integrity whilst also being flexible, capable of change and enjoying the process of evolution.

The following diagram outlines the steps in the process that take place in this journey into a larger world. As you can see this is a process of change and transformation that encompasses the challenge of fully embracing and living Life.

The hero’s journey is something that each of us on the Natural team have embraced through life in our own distinctive flavour.

I have spent 15yrs in intensive training and developing understandings of the world and relationships with an aim towards fully understanding and liberating myself and others from existential conflicts and challenges. Through explorations in consciousness, shamanism, sexuality Tantra, body work, mindfulness and the myriad forms of relationships that I have experienced along the way. I have gained knowledge and wisdom that has proven to be of immense benefit to myself and those that I share with that come in to contact with me.

Lifestyle Design vs Seduction (Video)

26th March 2020
James Marshall

Next level Lover Secrets (Video)

If you’re like most guys you want to feel like you can lead and create a good time for your lover in the bedroom. A guy that knows how to lead and create an exciting and fulfilling experience for a partner or partners will have a great skill and advantage when it comes to creating and maintaining attraction. Sex, sensuality and the ability to create romantic adventures has massive value and power to leave a positive emotional impact with those your share it with.

When it comes to being a great seducer and lover it is important to keep a focus on sharing sexual adventures worth remembering.

There are a lot of areas that you can explore when it comes to sexual, personal and PUA development. Being more sensual and capable as a lover is one of the most important if you truly wish to convey a high level of confidence in your ability to lead, satisfy and be well remembered by a lover.

Developing a well-rounded lover skill set is something that will definitely change your life for the better. In my opinion it is something that every man should have high on his list of personal development and sexual relationship goals. Ideally this learning curve is about opening yourself to a strong sense of sensual expression so that you can explore and share a deeper range of sexual and sensual variety. With practice this will develop a more extended capacity to be sensual, sexual, creative, intuitive, and confident. With more capacity and skill the whole experience of sex and sensuality can go to a new level.

Recognise where you’re at and start from there.

We all exist on some spectrum of skill and experience in being great lovers, and we all have potentials, strengths and weaknesses in different areas. The good news is that we can always learn to be better lovers. Like learning to cook or exercise it’s a life skill that will benefit you no matter who you are.

There are few investments in life that give us (and our lucky lovers) the returns that becoming a good lover will. The hard part of the process is recognizing that it takes time to get good at anything. It has been said in studies of mastery that it takes at least 10,000 hrs of experience to be really good at what you do. What this means is that you have some work to do practicing giving and receiving pleasure. The good news is that will some direction and support you can be very good in a short amount of time. SO what are some good starting points?

Work with both Sex and Sensuality:

Within the realms of intimate exchange there is a spectrum of sex and sensuality. Sex is often seen at the friction of genital contact. This is the more physical part of the spectrum whereas sensuality is more to do with exploring the senses and the potentials within them. Sensuality although also physical is about setting up a more subtle energetic feeling experience and psychological framework for experiencing love making and intimacy. Touch, sight, smell, sound, taste and mind are all senses that can be sensually explored and developed. A good lover will have the capacity to create very sensual as well as sexual experiences.
This is where things like knowledge of the body, massage and sexual psychology are very useful.

Get back in your body

A lot of people are so disconnected from their sensuality and sense of connection to their bodies. The concept of exploring a deeper level of sexuality can be a foreign and unexplored terrain. Especially if the ideas of being in the body, feeling and experiencing touch in a more subtle way, seem out of the norm or unknown.

It’s ok if you feel like this, it just means that you have some development and experience to go through.

For many lovers, embodiment is shallow and clunky. With little skill and experience in sensual embodiment, sex often becomes a rigorous, disconnected, friction based act. More aimed to get to the goal of coming hard and fast than appreciating and exploring the joy of making love, being sensual and deepening the range and kinds of pleasure possible between you and your lover.

Sadly this friction based sex alone often leaves us feeling dissatisfied, spent and empty like we have just eaten junk food. Some partners (especially women) are sexually blocked and unfortunately find sex to be a numbing experience. These people often see sex as something that is to be put up with in order to gain other favors like companionship, validation, comfort, security etc.

Ideally we want to be neither sex junkies (needing high intensity sensory overwhelm to be satisfied) or numb to the sexual experience (apathetic to or disconnected from our sex lives). As with most things in life this is about finding a balance and exploring that sweet spot that is the middle ground between sex and sensuality, friction and focus of mind.

Sensuality and sexuality is about exploring a journey of connection, altered states of sensation and consciousness and consensually playing out roles (e.g masculine, feminine, active, surrender, domination, submission etc) that release, balance and affirm parts of our psyche and the relationships we share.The doorway to sensuality is the body and touch. When you drop into a sensual state and or can lead someone else on a sensual journey it’s like opening another dimensions of our being to share.

So there you have a few tips that are useful for you to develop your sensual lover skills. If you have any questions let me know and hit up the comments or send me a general inquiry.I’m available for sexuality and inner game coaching and have just released a sensual massage product to get you guys inspired on your sensual lover journey. Get VIP updates and bonuses on Shae’s video course – Sensual Massage Secrets.Click HERE.

Get your Girl Back at the Club! (3 tips)

30th March 2020
James Marshall

Get your Girl Back at the Club! (3 tips)

Me: Give me your number just in case I lose you.
Girl: Ok.
Hold on…

(The mind’s anxious dialogue begins) Whoa, who’s that guy, why is she with him? Lightly touching his arm and smiling from ear to ear like he’s so impressive. Does he know game as well? Yeah, he must. Did she forget me? Should I say hi to remind her? Fuck, why is seduction so hard?

Sound familiar, don't worry guys. Time and time again, I went out at night and wanted a particular girl all to myself. I would meet a feminine, attractive, witty woman with confidence, who reminded me of why I got in seduction (for women like her), only to see her moments later giggling and flirting with another guy. It jived my emotions towards jealousy, then envy, then hope, etc. This is when I noticed, something needed to change...

Fast-forward dozens and dozens of situations like this to today, things have changed for me..

Me: “I will be around but just in case I lose you to a special new boyfriend, give me your number”.

Girl: haha ok.

(Random guy’s confused mind) What guy just walks a girl away while she’s in conversation? Does she know him? He’s a short fucker. Yeah they must know each other. Stupid slut.

Me: “I regret marrying you. My heart is in pain unless you mend it by saying I love you”.

Girl: “hahaha I love you. You are crazy!”

What a shift huh? After meeting many women out at night, I came to the understanding that often women want to flirt with many guys. A big reason women go out is to feel the validation of multiple men chasing her.

Even though we may have had a good connection, it doesn’t mean I own her or she owes me anything. Of course, she’s likely to flirt around the room before choosing a guy.

But it’s not just random chance who gets the girl. If I’ve had a good connection with her and then take the lead and keep several important principles in mind, then most of the time, other men are no real competition.

I manage to take a girl back from 2 much bigger and persistent guys using the following 3 concepts:

1. Stop engaging with the men she is talking to

My mindset is that all other guys are irrelevant to the interaction. The girl matters. Go right to the girl and engage her like you know her. Well, because you do. When your competition inevitably tries to engage you or her, dismiss him without aggression and focus on the girl.

2. “Move her. Move fast”

Before the girl even has a chance to process what’s happening, I move her after saying hi again. In some cases I literally pick her up but the important thing is to create physical distance between her and other men. Be aware that I would only do this to women I clearly had a good connection with. Which brings us to the the third point…

3. Flirtatiously set up a role-play to get her on my side.

Women love role-playing. Most conversations in clubs are boring and predictable. Women go out to have fun and live out fantasies, and playing roles is an important part of that. Part of how I create a unique connection, is to often set up fun role playing dynamics. Use your imagination, simple stuff like Husband/Wife, Boss/Secretary, King/Queen etc. These roles have automatic sexual tension and rapport built into them, allowing you to stand out and bypass all the boring small talk. This means when I reapproach I can jump straight back into role play; “ Is my wife on the verge of cheating on me?”.

Be playful with it and she will respond very well.

Follow these simple steps and you’ll find when you go out at night, it will no longer seem like a chaotic free for all. Instead you will be able to confidently meet, attract, and get back the women you speak to. Try out my tips and watch the woman of “his dreams”, fall back into your arms. If you have question about this topic or inquiry, please click HERE.

The one thing that holds you back from sexual success

30th March 2020
James Marshall

The one thing that holds you back from sexual success

The reason most men fail with women has less to do with their technical approach to them than their beliefs about their own worthiness. I’ve known men who’s timing was off, who’s flirtation was rudimentary at best, who dressed like dorks and had no money but still got top shelf women all the time.

I’ve also taught many men, who from societal judgement are successful, tall, good looking, charming, kind who (until we kicked them into gear), labored through frustrating loneliness and relationships with women they accepted out of scarcity.

Watch our shy, short Asian student work through his demons to success

Of course, having a working knowledge of seduction, delivery, presence, body language, logistics, escalation, all this is important. However, underlying the approach you use, the tricks you try is your own sense of self worth, entitlement and mission purpose. Without strength here, you will struggle endlessly against your own shadow. I think the roots of most men’s insecurities are deep and often complicated but there are two aspects that tend to dominate.

One is a nagging doubt that inherently you don’t have what it takes, that for some reason outside your control, you were given a shitty hand to play with. The other aspect is a misunderstanding about what women actually want from a man. We are sold certain standards through our society and media that equate male sexual success with looks, money and status.

The truth is women are generally after something much more valuable and rare, a man who can handle her. A man who makes her feel sexy or as the girl in the video says about Jack, to “Feel like a woman”. The paradox is that worthiness and confidence are not destination states. You don’t get them and that’s it. The process of cold approaching women, forces you to confront your real and imagined limitations and if done intelligently gives you new thinking tools to discern which are delusional bad mindsets and which are areas you need to work on in yourself.

This short film follows the journey one of our students Jack went through with us on a recent Euro Tour. Jack is a 5’3”, shy, inexperienced guy from Taiwan. After years of experimenting with other schools, he came to us with a firm commitment to finally solve this problem. Although as you see, he has a rough start, his plucky good humour and persistence pays off. It’s so gratifying as a coach to help guys like Jack who have great hearts and so much to offer women, finally crack the internal and real world codes for releasing their masculine potential.

If you’ve let those dark cyclical thoughts in your head of not being tall, rich or cool enough stop you from meeting the women of your dreams, take some inspiration from Jack and get out there to seize your dreams. And if you want to join our Euro Tour click HERE.

Top 3 Wingman Qualities

30th March 2020
James Marshall

Top 3 Wingman Qualities

The most important aspect of a good wingman relationship is that you are on the same team. This sounds extremely obvious but is an attitude that the vast majority of men don’t have. They compete with each other, pull each other down, hang shit on each other, and this extends to seduction opportunities.

1. Having his back

A simple example; James and me were talking to two Russian sisters.

Her: This shirt makes you look boring
James: [Smiles, doesn’t say anything]
Her: [Turns to me] Don’t you think his shirt is ugly!
Me: [Smiles] I think it suits him… I think you secretly like it coz it makes him look a sexy businessman. Is that your fantasy?
Her: Ohhh… Mr Executive [She blushes and playful slaps him] I might have to work late tonight… sir.

It’s simple, but I’m siding with him, and turning her playing jab into something they can flirt about.I shouldn’t have to say this, but a lot of guys can’t handle the social pressure when meeting knew people, and the only way they know how to deal with the tension is to pull other people down.

3. Releasing the social pressure and making the girl feel safe.

This is probably the most advanced aspect of being a good wingman. Any moment where you are interacting with the girl your wing is seducing, your goal should be making her feel, relaxed, safe, and included.

At the bar this means positioning your body so she can be part of the conversation, keeping a warm friendly energy towards her, releasing social pressure by smiling. Don’t try to be funny or put her down. For most girls this will put unnecessary awkwardness into the situation for no reason.

This is even more important when he brings her home. When they walk in, smile, introduce yourself, and remember that she is entering a strangers house. How you act in this situation can determine how relaxed she feels about staying. This is NOT the time for in jokes or trying to be funny.

So be polite, friendly, and make yourself scarce once she’s settled in. And if you need to get private couching, feel free to CONTACT US.

Approach Anxiety Made Simple

27th March 2020
James Marshall

One Simple Hack That Will Revolutionize How You Talk To Women

Remember: women feel social pressure too. If she’s suddenly been approached by a cool guy who isn’t trying to impress her or talk her head off, that sends the message that he’s not just another average guy.

Even if you don’t know what to say…

Picture yourself walking down the street, minding your own business. Suddenly someone runs up to you randomly, a complete stranger you’ve never met and starts rambling. Not just rambling, like talking nonsense, but speaking so fast you can barely get a word in.

And before you’ve responded or had a chance to ask them a question, they’ve already moved on and started talking about something else.

Before long it becomes apparent that they have no intention of having an actual conversation with you, or worse, actually want to take the time to find out something about you.

When guys first start approaching, this is something they subject women to ALL. THE. TIME.

And we see it on workshops consistently, no matter which country we coach in, where the guy comes from, 365 days of the year.

Understanding Social Pressure

Whenever two people are interacting, there is an ebb and flow of the conversation that will demonstrate the level of comfort.

If you’re chatting with your mom, you’re not going to be too concerned about making a good impression, hoping that she likes you and you get to see her again.

You’re just going to be casually chatting away, and probably have never even thought about the meta level of the conversational dynamic. But if its a super hot girl you’re talking to, that is a complete stranger and could brutally reject you, suddenly the stakes are higher.

Enter social pressure.

Your throat tightens up. Your heart is pounding in your chest, and your palms start to sweat.

Instead of letting the anxiety get to you, it’s possible to just sit with the tension.

This means speaking slowly.

This means intentional pauses.

This means awkward silences.

Here’s The Key:

Women feel social pressure too. If she’s suddenly been approached by a cool guy who isn’t trying to impress her or talk her head off, that sends the message that he’s not just another average guy.

He might even have something to offer her.

And suddenly she feels social pressure. She starts filling the awkward silences for you, asking you questions about yourself, maybe even trying to impress you.

Just like that, with one simple shift, you’ve all of a sudden gone from bumbling mess to attractive guy.

Sound too easy?

Then try this. Next time you’re talking to a girl, even if it’s at work or in class, just try shutting up. As soon as you feel the impulse to talk, notice it, then say nothing.

And watch the magic happen.

Remember that you can start to break your social pressure RIGHT NOW with Marshall Meditation Method online course. Click here.

How To Deal With High Energy People

30th March 2020
James Marshall

How To Deal With High Energy People

If everyone around you is talking, making jokes, jumping around, it can seem like they’re the life of the party, having all of the fun, and you’re kind of a wet blanket who’s bringing everyone down.

Even if you’re an introvert and ‘low energy’

Today’s question comes from Kevin in Vienna who asks:

As an introverted guy, I feel nervous and awkward around high energy or extroverted girls. How do I handle these situations?

Being an introvert myself I know how uncomfortable it can get being in a social situation with people who are high energy and feeling really overwhelmed.

This can be especially hard when it comes to girls who want to race off and explore the world, or who talk non-stop, or are constantly distracted by people and things around them.

It can seem like they have an endless abundance of energy. So why would a girl like that want to hang around with a low energy guy?

Accepting Yourself

Firstly, if you’re a low energy guy, you need to accept it.

There’s no use fooling yourself into thinking that you can just ‘pump your state’ and suddenly match the energy of people who are naturally extroverted.

Not only will you burn out very soon, but it will become apparent to everyone around you that you’re putting on a facade to be more like them, rather than just being comfortable in your own skin.

But sometimes, being yourself CAN be uncomfortable, right?

What are you supposed to do with all of that nervous tension that’s building up inside of you?

How do you cope with the thoughts running through your head telling you that she’s getting bored or wishes you were more fun?

Is it even possible to shift away from that paralysis and towards taking action, like getting her number, or if it’s a date, going for a kiss?

Yes, it is. But the solution may surprise you.

Basking In The Awkwardness

Instead of reacting to the awkward feelings that come up when you’re around high energy people, have you ever thought about just sitting in it?

I know it may sound counter intuitive, because if something is uncomfortable, we’re biologically programmed to get away from it.

Next time you’re in a social situation around lots of high energy people, try this:

Begin by acknowledging to yourself, even in your mind, that you’re uncomfortable.
Notice that you have tension inside of you that says “if i don’t do something right now, something bad is going to happen”
Wait for the tension to resolve.

Sound too good to be true?

I’m sure it does! Let me tell you though, I’m frequently getting myself into situations that make me feel awkward and uncomfortable. Even clothes shopping can freak me out; as soon as I walk into the store I have these cool chicks asking me all of these questions when I don’t even know what I want!

But then all I do is acknowledge that the tension is there, that I’m uncomfortable, and let it pass. If it seems too hard for you right now, I’d suggest checking out the Marshall Meditation Method. This is an online course designed to teach you meditation even if you’ve never learned how before.

The reason why meditation is so useful in these situations is because instead of not knowing what to do with all of the tension inside of you, suddenly you have the tools to just let it be there.

And the more you accept those feelings and make way for them, the sooner they will shift and change and move to something else.

In real life, this looks like someone else doing something to resolve the tension. Maybe someone will crack a joke, or the girl will ask you a question.

So make sure you try it next time you’re in an uncomfortable situation, and let me know how it goes!

Suicidal Thoughts: The Hidden Pain of Young Men

30th March 2020
James Marshall

Suicidal Thoughts: The Hidden Pain of Young Men

Truth is, you can’t instantly be the successful guy with the suit and rolex and hot blonde when you’re an 18 year old. Bottling up those other feelings generally turns guys to addictions like alcohol and drugs, violence against themselves or others, turning the feelings inwards into depression or in the worst cases, suicide.

The Struggle of Emotion

There is a huge stigma against men speaking out about their emotions, displaying weakness or that they can’t cope with what’s happening to them. As men, we’re expected to be tough, be strong, and feel pressure to constantly prove ourselves. Truth is, you can’t instantly be the successful guy with the suit and rolex and hot blonde when you’re an 18 year old. Bottling up those other feelings generally turns guys to addictions like alcohol and drugs, violence against themselves or others, turning the feelings inwards into depression or in the worst cases, suicide.

Throughout my teens and early twenties I experienced some very intense phases of depression. In those moments it can really feel like there is no way out, that things aren’t going to get better, and my habit was to seek out reinforcement of that idea but surrounding myself with negative influences. Having experienced those periods in my life and worked through them has allowed me to see that it is entirely objective; the experience itself is real, but the physical, mental and emotional aspects can change and evolve in a positive way.

When you’re young and inexperienced with women, particularly coming from a place of scarcity, it’s very easy to get tunnel vision and think you’ve found ‘the one’. Losing that girl or getting rejected can be absolutely devastating. Yes, heartbreak is a fucking bitch. In reality there is no ’the one’. There are multiple people you will meet throughout your life who you will share a deep and intimate bond with. The reason you cling onto one woman is because of the scarcity mindset; thinking that if you don’t get this one girl, you’ve fucked your once chance up and it will never happen for you.

Spreading Your Wings

Instead of focusing on one woman, get out into life and explore. Try on different personalities, different behaviours, different hobbies and interests, different friend groups, and especially different women. This will help you to get closer to what your passion really is, finding out who you really are and want you really want.

If you are feeling suicidal:

Talk to somebody about it, speak about it candidly. A family member or a professional (most countries have free hotlines you can call to talk to someone if you’re feeling suicidal).
Wait one more day. And then wait one more day. And then one more day. Don’t look it as a long term thing, think about your survival on a day by day basis.
Return back to the simple things in life that make you happy. Go for a walk, enjoy the sunshine and nature, interact with animals, eat some healthy, wholesome food.
If you’re particularly hung up on one girl, go out and meet some new girls, for the specific purpose of having fun and having sex.

And if you’re in a position to go to the next level by really conquering these tormenting thoughts, my online course the Marshall Meditation Method is designed to teach you a simple yet profound meditation system designed to draw your focus away from negative thoughts and into the present moment. Make sure you check it out by clicking here.

For now, stay strong.

But don’t be Tough.

James

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