31st March 2020
James Marshall

Women Who Don’t Give Out Their Phone Number

Rather than thinking “oh, she said no when I went for the number because she doesn’t want to go on a date with me”, ask yourself: What other reasons could she have for saying no?

and what to do about it!

If you’ve ever asked a girl for her number and she say’s no, it can be one of the most soul crushing things ever. Nothing sucks more than having a smooth chat only to be thrown an abrupt curveball out of nowhere.

But why do women say no when you ask for their number?

Is it because they don’t like you?

Is it because they have a boyfriend they aren’t telling you about?

Or is it something much more complex, intricate and confusing that only the infamous dating coach and natural seducer James Marshall can deduce?

Let’s find out.

Cracking The Code

When it comes to seduction, there is rarely a situation that is a complete carbon copy of the other.

Even though pickup lines and routines are only practiced by guys in their 40’s who ‘just can’t let go of the old ways’, a lot of men still hold onto the idea that there is a one size fits all approach to certain situations.

That there is a perfect opener.

Or a perfect way to ask for her number.

Or the perfect first text to send afterwards.

Here at The Natural Lifestyles we always focus on taking a step back from this focus on situations and instead look at the meta of a situation.

So rather than thinking “oh, she said no when I went for the number because she doesn’t want to go on a date with me”, ask yourself: What other reasons could she have for saying no?

The Creepy Texter

A lot of women have a story about this one guy in their life. No, he wasn’t the charming romantic who swept her off her feet.

Instead, he was the guy who she innocently gave her number to because at the time she thought he was cute, or he made her laugh.

Emphasis on the innocent here. She wasn’t hearing wedding bells or picturing their family home, it was just done on a whim, a spur of the moment kind of thing.

Yet because most men are coming from a place of complete SCARCITY and have very limited options with women, getting a woman’s number = sex.

All they need to do is pester her enough times until she finally submits.

So they text her.

And then text her some more.

When she doesn’t respond, they call.

And then when there is no answer, you know what the

y do?

That’s right. They leave a voice message.

Then send a text.

You know.

Just in case the voicemail didn’t work.

So suddenly she’s gone from giving out her number to some guy she barely knows who is now constantly harassing her.

The last thing she wants to do is give him the impression that she’s interested, so she doesn’t respond.

But instead of him getting the hint, he just thinks she’s playing “hard to get” and so texts him even more.

Talk about a nightmare.

Calling It Out

Since I’ve been doing this for many, many years, I’ve heard countless stories like this from women about their experiences with men.

So when I hear “I don’t give my numbers to strangers”, I don’t interpret that as “I don’t want to date you”, but rather “I’ve done that before and deeply regretted it”.

In this instance a little reassurance goes a long way.

Just the fact that I mention this to her is a huge weight off her shoulders.

If you want to hear more about my origin story and how I eventually became the world’s leading dating coach, you can read all about it in A Natural History. It’s an autobiography chronicling my early days starting out as a seducer, not to mention all of the mistakes I made along the way.

Admittedly, I may have had a creepy texter phase too, but you’ll have to click here to find out more…

The Sixth Sense

What this really boils down to is developing a sixth sense, a seducers empathy if you will, when you’re interacting with women.

Know that they’ve had to deal with a whole range of bizarre behaviour from men which was totally unwelcome, and for some women that makes them incredibly hesitant when meeting new men.

Especially if you’re two strangers who have just met on the street like I was meeting this redhead in Prague.

So next time you’re having a morning after with a girl, maybe ask her about some of the experiences she’s had with men. Her answers will likely shock you…

Do Girls Care About Looks?

31st March 2020
James Marshall

Do Girls Care About Looks?

Somewhere along the way as we were evolving as humans, the genes got mixed up or a social meme developed where men suddenly started believing that because they are drawn towards women who are physically attractive, then women must work exactly the same way!

The mystery has finally been solved! All you have to do in order to attract a really hot woman is to be really hot yourself!

Excellent. We can all give up on this hard seduction business and simply hit the gym. Why risk getting rejected by approaching when you can just workout to the point where you look SO good that women will approach YOU?

The Harsh Truth

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but this simply isn’t how women work.

Granted, some women will go out on the prowl at night seeking a hot stud to take home for a quick romp in the sack.

But I’m yet to have seen a woman walk up to a complete stranger on the street and compliment him on how attractive he is.

And I’ve seen thousands of men who could easily be models get harshly rejected and forgotten by women because they lacked the fundamental skills of dating.

The truth is, that whilst women do care about how men look, there is a lot more at play for them then simple appearances.

For example, how you make her feel. You’ll notice that my online course, The 5 Principles of Natural Seduction, mentions nothing about buying a slick leather jacket or growing a hipster beard. It’s all about focusing on the underlying principles, the fundamentals of how seduction works, moment to moment, when you’re talking to a woman.

Developing an emotional connection. Expressing your sexual intent. Being able to pull the trigger.

All of these things are fundamental if you’re going to be seducing women.

The reason that certain ‘styles’ or ‘looks’ work is because women associate that image with the bad boy they knew in high school, or the suave charmer from their favourite movie who’s lines they’ve memorised.

Guys who, coincidentally, are conveying the principles of seduction in their own way.

Keeping Up Appearances

It is important to maintain a standard of dress and grooming when you’re meeting women and going on dates. This means dressing in a way that conveys your personality, and taking care of your appearance such as trimming your beard and not having funky breath.

But what is going to make a much bigger difference is your attitude towards women and how they see you.

Forget the idea that women are ‘checking you out’. Maybe you’re wearing a pair of glasses that remind her of her Dad. Maybe you kind of look like her high school crush. Or maybe you have ketchup on your face.

If you’re banking on women finding you attractive physically before you speak to them, you’re going to have to be incredibly patient with seduction.

Instead, try this on for size. Accept the idea that women don’t find you attractive.

It might sound counter intuitive, but the whole idea behind this is that instead of relying on your looks, you’re instead focusing on things that are actually in your control. Your approach skill set, your mindsets, your internal beliefs.

Through expressing who you are as a man, you’re going to be forming real connections with women. If you’re relying solely on your looks, she’s just going to walk away as soon as she sees how little confidence you have, or run along to a more handsome man who’s just walked in the room.

Being Yourself Under Social Pressure

31st March 2020
James Marshall

Being Yourself Under Social Pressure

Have you ever noticed that you’re not yourself all of the time?

James Marshall explains why it’s hard to be yourself around beautiful women.

Have you ever noticed that you’re not yourself all of the time?

That sounds like a very esoteric question, so let me put it this way.

Why is it that when you’re hanging around friends that you’ve known for years, or talking to your mom, it’s really easy to be yourself.

There isn’t any social pressure, you don’t feel like you have to think of something to say next. It’s just...normal.

But when you’re talking to some intimidating, like a beautiful woman, things can really change.

Building Bridges

Most guys think that in order to be yourself you need to be cool, relaxed and at your best. If you’re someone who is very analytical and logical, say an engineer or software programmer, there is often a lot of pressure to get things perfect.

And for good reason! I’m certainly grateful that we have guys such as yourself double and triple checking the math so that skyscrapers and planes are falling down around me.

But when it comes to meeting beautiful women, trying to get everything perfect doesn’t really serve you.

For one, it means that you’re constantly going to be thinking about what to say and do, instead of just focusing on her.

And secondly, social interactions are rarely ever perfect, especially seduction. In all of my years I’ve pulled off one, maybe two seductions where everything went 100% perfectly.

Most of the time things go wrong. So how is it that you can bridge the gap between not being yourself under social pressure, to feeling comfortable no matter who you’re talking to?

Getting Out Of Your Head

The answer, is simple. Meditation. The journey may not be entirely simple, but the answer at least for now, is simple.

See, when something goes wrong in a seduction, it’s the perfect opportunity for your mind to pitch in and start causing problems.

Analyzing how that one thing you did wrong is going to ruin everything.

Pointing out the obvious mistake that you could have seen coming a mile away.

Convincing you it’s time to just give up to avoid further embarrassment.

So is the problem really external, or is it internal? Is it that you made a mistake, or how you process the mistake?

Sometimes it’s both. But the process of correcting that begins with meditation.

In the Marshall Meditation Method online course, I teach guys a practical way to meditate that is applicable to situations where you’re under high pressure.

Remember how I said the answer is easy, but the journey isn’t? I’ve done everything I can to distill over 10 years of meditation practice and study into an online course that takes you through meditation step by step, leading you up to the point where you can draw on the practice of mindfulness when you’re feeling social pressure. You can learn more by clicking HERE.

Getting The Job Done

With the right tools anything is possible, hence the course filled with everything you need to know. But your responsibility is to actually use those tools.

This means first being aware of how social pressure shows up in the moment.

Does your mouth get dry? Does your chest get tight? Does it feel like there’s a fuzzy sensation in your belly?

Next, identify the sensation. Rather than judging it, by saying “oh I’m nervous again”, just acknowledge that it’s there.

Finally, watch it pass away. Few sensations and feelings in life are consistent in every moment, and even those that are aren’t always necessarily in our field of awareness.

Meditation is all about helping you to get back to the present moment, out of your head, and hopefully, focused on the beautiful woman who is about you hand you her number.

WARNING: Your Friends Are Stopping You From Getting Laid

24th March 2020
James Marshall

Trapped In A Purposeless Life?

Most of us live very privileged lives, especially in terms of human history. We have access to unlimited amounts of food and safe shelter, we spend most of our day in climate-controlled offices sitting in comfy chairs, yet we seldomly feel happy and satisfied.

The search for meaning

Did you ever achieve an important milestone in life only to end up feeling incomplete and asking yourself…

“Now what is the next step?”

Most ambitious men do, and they think the answer is to keep scoring bigger and bigger goals, hoping that one day finally all the effort they put in will make them feel worthy and fulfilled - as if there is a final external goal that when reached, you will feel satisfied and finally at ease with yourself.

Unfortunately, this almost never works.

That’s why we see so many celebrities and high-status men becoming addicted to substances and toxic lifestyles. To escape the sense of emptiness that haunts them.

But what is causing this lack?

Realize that most of us live very privileged lives, especially in terms of human history. We have access to unlimited amounts of food and safe shelter, we spend most of our day in climate-controlled offices sitting in comfy chairs.

This is a very comfortable and safe bubble to live in…

Except that it doesn’t make us truly satisfied, because no matter how good of a life we are living, we still feel the primal call of the wild. We are animals after all.

How most confidence issues are born

In each of us, there is a yearning to escape the modern world with everything that entails, even if just for a short time. A deep calling exists to honor our instincts and masculine nature, to journey, to explore, to fight, dance, sing, and fuck.

By ignoring these instincts we don’t allow our subjective senses of entitlement and confidence to develop in the first place, in some senses we are still scared children.

This creates chronic problems in our social, sexual and internal worlds - whether that manifests as having a hard time making a woman sexually attracted to us or struggling to connect with highly successful guys.

For many years, you knew me as James Marshall, the seduction teacher, but experience taught me that, with most of my students, there is a more important deep individual work to be done that must develop in tandem with learning to seduce.

That’s why in the past two years I’ve been experimenting by putting together a whole new workshop at Natropia, my private retreat centre in Portugal. I’ve gathered together a team of world-class coaches and specialists in different schools of life enhancement, from movement to ancient sacred medicines and spirituality, to initiate men and reconnect them with the dormant warrior inside of them.

I called it the Natural Warrior Training, and the results with it so far have been both phenomenal and unexpected. Students were experiencing a deep sense of happiness and higher purpose and that was only a couple of days into the program.

Keep in mind, the Natural Warrior Training is definitely NOT for everyone. You don’t need to be an athlete or experienced in meditation but you do need an attitude of holistic learning. You must be willing to leave your job, your status, your pride at the gates to Natropia and embrace your vulnerability, power, and presence.

This is an 8-day intensive journey of deep self-exploration that will completely turn your inner and outer worlds upside down, revealing the root causes of any social, romantic and purpose issues that you might have, while rapidly enabling you to recreate the way you experience life.

I hope to see you at Natropia this August, ready to join me in this unique tribe.

Women Who Don’t Give Out Their Phone Number

and what to do about it!

Cracking The Code

The Creepy Texter

Calling It Out

The Sixth Sense

Follow Us

Do Girls Care About Looks?

Suicidal Thoughts: The Hidden Pain of Young Men

The Age Old Question Most Men Are Dying To Know The Answer To

The Harsh Truth

Keeping Up Appearances

Being Yourself Under Social Pressure