How To Set Goals (That You Can Actually Achieve)

   Shae Matthews   |   August 11, 2013   

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The Harsh Truth About Goals

It’s Shae here, coming at you with some more inner game wizardry all about goal setting.

Why is it that most people fail to achieve their goals? Think about something like ‘new year’s resolutions’; people declaring they will finally join a gym and lose weight, or quit their job and pursue their dream.

You might even have specific goals about your dating life. Maybe you tired of constantly being reminded by family and friends that you’re still single. Or maybe you’re tired of hoping it will finally happen, only to be disappointed each night you go to sleep.

And when you think about how long this problem has been going on, I’m sure you’ve been wondering why things haven’t changed.

Why you’re still not able to approach women.

Why you’re still not seeing the results you want

Why you still feel so lonely.

As hard as it might be to shine a light on these thoughts and feelings, it’s important to at least acknowledge where you’re at. That’s the first step to the goal setting process.

Being Realistic

See, there is a classic goal-setting format of building a solid plan, then taking the steps to execute that plan and grinding your ass off until it’s completed, no matter what obstacles present themselves.

But let’s be honest, if you’ve already found out that approaching is a possibility, and you haven’t already started taking steps towards it, that methodology really isn’t going to work.

Think about someone who is out of shape. It’s a no-brainer that they have to go on a diet and exercise more, but they can’t actually execute the plan.

So sometimes the plan isn’t the problem, but it’s making it happen.

A paradigm I’ve adopted throughout my life, and one that the other coaches here at The Natural Lifestyles follow, is viewing myself as a creator.

This begins with acknowledging that there is an unseen part of you, whether you want to call it your unconscious, deeper self, or even just your heart, that is available for you to tap into.

By planting a solid intention about what you want, you’re opening yourself up to the possibility that it could happen.

Sometimes that possibility is just enough for things to start shifting and moving, although it can be really hard for the ego to understand this because it’s so attached to grinding and hard work.

Yet we have to ask ourselves, what intention should we set? What genetic code should we instil into that seed to ensure that it grows into something that will bear fruit?

You could set yourself the intention to have a really beautiful girlfriend, and for some guys that's a legitimate goal.

But if you were to be honest with yourself, do you really feel ready for that? Do you feel like you’re the man you need to be, want to be, in order to have that woman?

How would you feel being with her knowing that you set yourself a goal to learn how to approach, to really gain the confidence to master it, yet never really pursued that until it became your reality?

What if your intention was instead to seek out the coaching you need to first become that man?

Making A Start, Even If It’s Small

If you’ve had a look at our workshops, I’m sure you’ve come up with one or two excuses why it’s just not going to happen for you.

Maybe it’s that you don’t have enough money. Maybe it’s that you can’t get the time off work. Or maybe you’re so wrapped up in your ego that you can’t admit to yourself that you need help.

Trust me, I know how hard it can be to let go of that pride.

But we know that most guys don’t even take the time to fill out an application. Most aren’t even willing to get on the phone with us and talk about their situation, and find a way to make it happen.

Keep in mind, you’re not signing up for some hardcore sales pitch, we actually just want to help in whatever way we can.

So if you’re setting yourself some goals for next year, maybe plant that seed. “What would it be like to do a workshop with the Natural Lifestyles? What resources, opportunities, connections do I need to come my way in order to make that a reality?”

Maybe you need to take a smaller step in order to convince yourself that it’s worthwhile. A lot of our clients have started with our beginners online course, The Dating Accelerator before moving on to our live coaching.

Over the 3 weeks of online content you’ll be given a simple framework to help you get over your approach anxiety, start approaching, and hopefully getting some numbers which will then lead to dates.

Will it mean you achieve your goal of having threesomes with playboy bunnies this time next month?

Probably not.

But it’s a start. It’s a way of you acting on your intention.

You’ll be amazed at what setting yourself that intention can lead to, especially if you’re willing to get out of your own way. Be sure to check out the Dating Accelerator by clicking here.

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